brain time at the okay corral

this is pancake....she's waiting patiently for winter to go the hell away.


'round here i feel like i’m in a dream space of waiting waiting waiting for spring. Its so quiet and just snow snow mud snow me and my animals...tick tock tick tock.
my body is in a lot of pain... i need some warm sunny days in the green grass!!!! I need a hot bath in plenty of water. I’m dreaming of that almost sedating, deep and heavy smell of the tiny mountain roses in bloom.
I’ve really had to learn to hone my patience living here. i ‘ve learned how to make not enough food last long enough...how to quell hunger and keep my blood sugar from dropping. How to make peace with the silence, my health and the subsequent lack of cash flow, the lack of human touch... patience.
if i know anything for sure, its that everything changes...always....better or worse.
spring will come in good time. people will come to the land. the grass will come up. the roses will bloom and stop me in my tracks as i go about my day.
and really, the warm season is just the time when mountain folk get ready for the next cold season. House fixing/building, food growing, wood gathering, hay baling,canning, shearing, and on and on....its all about surviving winter.

what the winter does offer is much brain time. I especially love it when i remember some forgotten tale of my past. I’ve done so many many different things in my half lived life. Today it struck me that i really need to write about some of my past lives...like when i was a sex worker in the bay area....esp. when i worked as a dominatrix. theres some real gems in there. oooooo lordy. i remember this one guy...he was a regular at the dungeon...we called him “ lou the underwear man”....

its no wonder i’m here on a mountain top.